bitches get stiches

Yesterday, I woke up and thought of a neat game…..

Also. Best headline ever.

I can’t be your apologist

I’m honestly not sure how to take this. Search term used today to find Dirt’s funnies:

“You can’t protect yourself from sadness”

I know that seems like a downer, but somehow I think it’s sweet that someone googled that sentence.

i feel like talking, but don’t preach. i’m all right. god don’t make no junk.

Just started carrying a little book to write ideas in. Here’s a smattering of the first week or so.

7/13 - fri/denver

- would be fun to write a biography of kilgore trout

7/18 - Tues/denver

- ‘Sometimes the best part of a record is the 2-3 seconds of silence between songs’

- would you be friends with your family if they weren’t your family?

7/19 - ‘when she asked if i was going back to the shelter, i realized i should change my clothes’

7/20 - ‘i’ve got enough character, what i really need now is a cheap drink’

i still confide in you almost every day, even though you’re not around.

no apologies. none. new comic. enjoy.

Little Help.

No contest today, at least not in the subject. I’m wanting to set up a website that sort of encompasses all this shit on Dirt’s Funnies. Back in the day, I had wanted to set up a media empire, if you will, based on the mathematical equation p–>q, which translates to ‘if p then q’, or ‘p implies q’. Unfortunately, both those names are taken, as is dirtbag.com. So I’m wondering what you, the readers, think I should go with. Below are a couple available names. Please let me know which you like, or if there’s something else you’d recommend.

www.pthenq.com

www.dirtsfunnies.com

www.ifpthendirt.com

I’m tired. I am pure of heart. You are tired. You are pure of heart.

Sorry sorry sorry. I know I know I know. I owe like 5 comix and 3 stories, and 12 funny jokes, and 7 awkward pauses.

I’ve wanted to do this for a while, post the search terms that people use to get to Dirt. Usually it’s song lyrics, and I always imagine people like PISSED that they’re trying to find a Neutral Milk Hotel lyric page, and get this shit instead. Oh well. Today though, it’s a little stranger:

dirtbag comics
the dirt on rachel fuller
i get carried away sometimes wake up in
“sebadoh poster”
man sleeping laying down
“how can I believe that everything in th

I’m not sure if I like ‘the dirt on rachel fuller’ or ‘man sleeping laying down’ better, but they both sort of rule.

Also, shout out to whomever googled ‘dirt’s comics’, perhaps the only person to get here on purpose.

Also, if you’re wondering about the contest for today’s post, it’s not a song. It’s a quote from a great book. Give it a shot though. You won’t regret it, I promise.

not finished yet

Warning: The title is not a song lyric, at least not one I know.

This is a 30-second design I made. I’d like to do a series of Vonnegut inspired tee-shirts, relating to characters and stories he wrote. This, obviously, is the high school team in Rosewater, Indiana, the hometown of Mr. Eliot Rosewater. Enjoy.

empty out my head, plunge your hands into my open head

First off, sorry about the delay. Crazy fun week. Secondly, was sent pictures of Dirt from the 70’s. Here’s the ole boy in ‘78 or ‘79. Check out the awesome Spider-Man iron on shirt. Anorexic hipsters would pay mad cash for that shit.

Thirdly, stories, comix, and the like are all cookin’ up in the old noggin’, hopefully with some actual work to come soon.

Fourthly, tip the bartender.

Fifthly, big election coming up in ‘08. Thoughts soon.

Lastly, school picture from, I believe 1981. That shirt was worn by all three of the dirt brothers in school pictures ranging from 76-81. Also, what a haircut! Mom ruled. Love you mom.